6 Reasons Why Most London Speed Dating Events Suck Arse

I don’t pull any punches when it comes to the piss-poor state of London speed dating events. I’ve been to my fair share. I’ve walked in a single man’s shoes for far too long to know the difference between good London speed dating events and bad London speed dating events.

But, you’re not here for my love life – you’re here to read about why most London speed dating events suck arse. I don’t want to bore you anymore than I already have – so here you go.


6 Reasons Why Most London Speed Dating Events Suck Arse

ONE: The Host Sucks

Ah, the life of the speed dating host. Sitting there watching the timer. Listening to a terrible “Ibiza chillout vibes 2014” playlist for the 34th time ….  Having a conversation with the barman about how bored they are. It’s any wonder as to how they haven’t already gone insane. I’ve been there when the host has basically made us sign in and that’s it. No animation. No guest interaction. Nada.

TWO: The Venue Sucks

OK, just because it has a bar, table and chairs and a roof – doesn’t mean it’s suitable for a social gathering. Some don’t even work in a private space and let randoms come in and out of the space as they please. Seriously.

THREE: Too Many People

How am I supposed to remember 25 people I met in one night? I mean, come on – that is seriously insane? I can barely remember what I ate for lunch in this day and age let alone the 25 women I met that evening. Pffffff.

FOUR: Not Enough Time

Wow, we get a whole 3 minutes to get our life stories out! Gee, heck. That’s awesome.

FIVE: They’re Expensive

£20 for what? Some of the prices we are getting charged is ridiculous. I know it’s London, but come on. Give me a break.

SIX: They’re Just Not Fun

They’re labouring. It’s 2 hours of “where are you from and what do you do?” without any distraction. By the end you’ve turned into some speed-dating Terminator that just glides from table to table….. And that’s not good.


This was not a pop at the competition at all as there are some great London speed dating events out there.

To do something a little different check out our events page to see what tickles your fancy!

Thanks for reading. Jordi.


Pic courtesy of The Frisky.